New Year's Eve . . .

The streets started to wear a deserted look as the people scurried into the crowded rabbit holes playing loud music. Probably this was the only time when people paid generously to be among crowd. They celebrated the eve to welcome the New Year in a special way, to remember for the days and months to come. He too was no exception and wanted to make it special for her. He had been planning for weeks. He ordered a chocolate cake with liquid chocolate filling to make the eve special.

They spoke, mocked and laughed till their stomach couldn't take the pain anymore. Water filled their eyes as they laughed. He looked into her eyes. He moved closer to her and slowly wiped the tears of her face. The laughter slowly turned into a sheepish smile. He slowly kissed her cheeks and felt the salt water on his lips. He didn't mind it. She turned pink. Slowly he took her face in his palms. He looked into her eyes and bent slowly forward towards her. Her eyes started to close as he reached for her lips. He could feel her lips open little as he kissed them. She held him in her arms as they kissed passionately. They welcomed the year in each others’ embrace as the clock struck 12.

They cut the cake together and helped her with a small piece  The liquid started to drip as she bit into it. The chocolate dripped from her lips and he didn't waste a minute before reaching out, feeling her chocolate laden lips. As they shared the moment, she could feel coolness of a metal rising to her neck. Before she could say anything his hands reached behind her neck and clasped the hook. She couldn't speak as she starred at it and looked back at him. It was shining and augmented her slender neck. He smiled wickedly. Tears swelled in her eyes and she feel in his arms.

As he tried to extend his hand, he felt his hand grasped hard and shaken violently. He looked up to find people around him wishing each other, few of them smiling and laughing. Slowly many shook his hands. He searched for her desperately but in vain. She wasn't there. It took a while before he realized that she wasn't with him. He shed silent tears. He wasn't alone, but he felt lonely without her. A New Year eve without her.

It was raining & . . .

The mist covered the glass. The dark clouds looked vicious and relentless as they continued on their mission. It has been torrential down pour. The mist turned into droplets of water as I ran my fingers over the glass. The trees arched to stand as the wind lashed out hard at them. The lightning split the sky and the thunder that followed echoed for minutes.

I let my hand slide through the window to feel the rain coming down hard at anything in its way. Slowly, her fingers intertwined with mine as she joined me. She rested with her back to me in my arms. I could feel the softness of her skin. Her fragrance was intoxicating.  Her closeness was providing the required warmth and coziness.

I put my hand around her and pulled her close. She twitched as I felt her nape of the neck. Her fingers tightened the grip and locked mine. She closed her eyes as she let     head fall back on my shoulder. Her lips quivered. I could feel her breath. I moved to feel her skin, when few droplets splashed on my face. As I tried wiping them away, I only failed as they lashed out from within. I embraced myself reliving those memories and the view blurred again.

Image Source: http://digital-photography-school.com/13-fabulous-photos-of-a-rainy-day

I was . . .

This was the first time I ever sat in the corner of the open space on the first floor. It oversaw the vacant housing plots all around the house and the ring road beyond them, buzzing with the perennial flow of the vehicles en route to their destinations. The breeze swayed the trees and soon the clouds invaded the blue sky. In a distance I could see the sky changing its colours as the sun retired for the day. In few minutes it was going to be dark. The cool breeze caressed the skin. I could feel my body reacting to the changing weather as the goose bumps became quite prominent and the hair stood up as if they were in all readiness for a battle. Thick carpet of yellow flowers adorned the path in front of the house. The eclectic mix of colours by the nature can never be captured in their true form without any effluence.






I was slowly losing myself in the warmth of the nature when few memories crossed my silent mind. They started small but created ripples as they passed by. The moments I had spent with her have surfaced. I could feel the ripples gathering momentum. They started to push from within and could feel them moving and pushing other parts of the body to rhyme with them. Within no time, all were orchestrating. Before I could realise, the canvas around me started to blur. No longer were they containable as they found their way out and started to trickle down in a flow. I could not stop them from running down. She could never go out of my mind. I sat there with the thought of being alone, but I wasn’t. I was lonely.

Knew I Was . . .

“I will never leave you”, they vowed to each other. They did not want to bother about the times ahead and let the things unfold as they are bound to. Being happy in each other’s company, they just wished that it could go on forever in their lives. They would just lay in each other arms forgetting the entire world around them.

Time and distance played their role to perfection; created circumstances that tested their bonding. In their small happy world, discussions and arguments took birth. They would occasionally stretch into hours of silence between them. They eventually made up and grew stronger in the relationship. Sometimes fights in the relationship are important to understand each other better.  While both of them were possessive, he was a notch higher. It choked her at times.

As the times of testing got harder, turbulences became greater. Pangs of separation have started to hurt him. He wanted to see her, be with her even more. Not being able to communicate frequently hurt him even more. Pouring out concerns and debating them have dominated the most of the little time that was available for them. In spite of being aware of the importance of the time, the mountain of emotions got better of him. He knew it was testing times. But unknowingly his love had gagged her.

Time doesn’t always provide second chances. That day, it wasn’t enough for the patch up as she wasn’t reachable. Next couple of hours were uneventful. It was the silence before the storm. His phone beeped and was excited to message from her. There was a mail waiting for him. He slumped as soon as he saw it. It was from her and it read “Knew I was losing you”. He could not read it any further. It shook him up. He replied, hoping it to be a horrible joke being played on him and waited eagerly for a response. It was dawn and the sun was already high and shining resplendently. Still the computer said “There is no new mail”.

It is HER . . .

I felt some weight on my hand as I lay on the bed with my hands outstretched. My tired eyes were shut tight. I didn't care to bother. I could feel the long strands of hair tickle my skin as the weight moved closer to my shoulder. A hand crossed my chest and held me. I felt her close to me. She was now painfully close. I could feel her bosom against me. I could feel her grip soften. I was surprised. Then I could feel the long hair covering my face. The smell was strikingly familiar. Before I could realize, I felt the soft lips devour mine. The taste buds recognized the flavour immediately. I desperately waited for her. I loved her. I wanted to see her. As I accomplished the herculean task of opening my eyes, I saw encompassing darkness around myself.

I Feel Like . . .

I feel like seeing you, but you aren’t visible

I feel like listening to you, but you aren’t audible

I feel like talking to you, but you aren’t listening

I feel like sharing with you, but you didn’t care

I feel like holding you, but you aren't present

I feel like hugging you, but you resist

I feel like being with you, but I am alone

A Walk in the Woods . . .

Birds chirped as they left their homes. Squirrels and lizards scurried through the trees. The breeze carried the fragrance of the wet soil across the forest. There was a distant roar of the waterfall. The droplets of water glistened in the sunlight that timidly sneaked its way through the thick canopy formed by the trees. Early morning drizzle had moistened the dry leaves lying around. Some leaves which dared the morning drizzle, quivered in the breeze. They whimpered as we trampled them mercilessly without paying much heed to their existence. 

She walked in the front, as I followed her close enough to feel her presence. She was glowing as the sunlight lit her skin. She was looking unblemished, flawless and as fresh as the surroundings around. Her fragrance filled my lungs. Her hair bounced on her shoulders as she walked carefully trying to avoid the roots and fallen branches. I could not resist myself from being cast under the spell of her beauty.

The nature was exhilarating. We did not speak much before she tripped over suddenly. Before she could fall I held her hand and helped her recover. She smiled as if she knew that I would not let her down. As we resumed our walk through the woods, she held my hand and walked. I hesitated; she held it even firmly, looked at me and smiled. She made me feel comfortable. She moved closer and put my arm around her. I could feel her body against mine as we slowed down our pace.

She started to run. As I looked up, I established the reason. He was standing at the far end, probably waiting for her. I was knocked out before I could savour the moment completely. I looked helplessly as she parted from me. I could not help but watch her just go away, only wishing she would stop in her tracks and turn. The vision started to get hazy as the water became too heavy for the eyes to hold on longer. They synthesised with the rain as both came down at the same time, cloaking the weak moments. I don’t know if she ever looked back; I closed my eyes hard as the water from within merged with the rain outside.

We Fought Hard . . .

She ran like she ran for life. I had never seen being as fast as I continued to chase her. I was closing in on her when she did the unexpected. She turned sharply and flung it hard at me. Even before I could come to screeching halt, the violent blow took me by surprise. It shook me up a bit as she took one more hit at me before I recovered. I was now two strikes behind and sought revenge. I ran even harder to catch up with her. We exchanged numerous blows before I sensed her body giving away. Eyeing the opportunity, I went for the knock out. She fell on the bed as the cotton from the pillows was all around.  I fell onto the bed next to her as we laughed till we cried. We looked at each other and exchanged few things we could never say. I put my hand around her as she hugged me tight.

Sans Her

The knob turned and she was in the doorway smiling broadly, with open arms. As soon as I entered the room, she held me in warm embrace. She kissed delicately and made me comfortable. Her hug flushed out the day’s labour. I could feel her smooth fingers as I placed mine against hers.  She lay close to me, resting on my shoulder and playfully kissed the fingers. Her soft lips brushed against the fingers. She looked into my eyes lovingly and whispered in my ears. She was mine, as we lay there in each other’s arms.

The door clicked opened. Room lit brightly as I switched the lights on. The door closed behind me as I walked into the other room. It was empty. There was no life without her. Living without her was like living without life. 


I was alone and lonely.

The Friendly Valley

The landscape was covered by lush green carpet. Even though there was no uniformity in the thickness, it certainly looked bright and even darker in patches. Few trees announced to the fellow comrades of their height by standing out tall enough to be visible for miles. The invisibility cloak of the constantly moving clouds hid some of the hills, occasionally providing an opportunity for a quick glance. The altitude of the place made the place cooler than expected even during the summer. Sun light was welcome as it was soothing on the skin for a change. I was innately exultant experiencing the freshness of the nature.  I felt alive as I took deep breath and filled my lungs with the fresh air.

Surprisingly enough, dark clouds invaded and were slowly engulfing the bright skies. I could see their armies marching across the vast green cover. The hills too were timid to stand up for them. The valley whose depth I could not fathom looked even more sinister. The air got even cooler and I could feel the skin react to the sudden change in the climate. I rubbed my palms on my arms to generate some warmth. Innumerous thoughts about her crossed my mind with sporadic break of thoughtlessness.

I reflected on the instances, when she simply hugged me. I held her in my arms, and sometimes she tried to play mischievous with me.  She kissed me teasingly and sometimes passionately. In some situations, she would just simply smile and make my day.  I was full of her. These thoughts just made me smile for a minute before the dark clouds completed their invasion and started to exercise their might. The heavy drops of water woke me up from the dream and reminded me of the message that I received a while ago. Its contents shook my roots. Like a news ticker, my mind started played the contents “You are nothing more than a friend to me”.

By the time I reacted to the change in the climate, I was drenched completely. I could not make out the difference between the water coming from above and from within me. The heart was doing extra work pumping out extra blood to squeeze out the excess water from the body in tears. The water was making the vision blurred. The valley looked friendly all of a sudden with its outstretched arms. I needed a friend and I found one. I just closed my eyes hard, switching off the ticker and it was silent all around. 

The Promise

She said we would meet soon to which I replied in affirmative. She kept her side of promise. We did meet again. She was there standing at the door for me. She was dressed in white and looked ravishingly beautiful. The dress fitted her perfectly accentuating her curves. I was living a dream. I could not believe the moment had actually materialized. Guess my heart got used to the extra work load, as it started punching its chamber violently the moment she appeared in front of me.

I straight away took her into my arms without any delay. She smiled and reciprocated as she too held me tight. She was there in my arms and I was in no hurry to let her go. She was the drug that would keep a check on my heart beat. I let her go only after the medication had its complete effect. I looked into her eyes, pushing away the strands of hair blocking her vision. They conveyed a lot without even letting a syllable out of her mouth. My palms enclosed her face. As we got closer, she twitched and held me tight. We realized that we were more than friends.

We spent quality time with each other, occasionally expressing our love without saying it loud. Sometimes, when things are on a roll, you would need to expect the unexpected. She opened up few delicacies that were created by her own hands and served them for dinner. She not only fulfilled her promise, but also made it very memorable. The dinner was lip smacking and finger licking. As I was busy savoring and devouring the food, she slowly held me from behind. I could not have asked for more. Tears clouded my eyes for her act of love. I kissed her gently expressing my delight. The parting was pleasingly painful. I didn’t want to go, but I had to. I too had promised her something before leaving, and I am frantically waiting for the day to keep up mine.

It Happened Again . . .

She has been missing for a while without a trace. Discomfort filled the heart. Why did she leave suddenly? She wasn’t even reachable. My questions remained unanswered. I did not know if I would ever see her again. Even though we were friends, both of us knew we definitely had something more than that. Our meeting the other day left an intense desire for her. I wanted to see her again. I wanted to spend time with her. I have put in fervent efforts in tracing her.

My phone rang as I was trying to indulge in shopping for myself. The number looked familiar. As I picked up the call, I was shocked. The voice made me go weak in my knees. I was not sure if I was dreaming. I couldn’t move. My heart was thumping. I could hear the voice now even more clearly as if it was inside in my ear. I turned around and was taken aback. She was there standing in front of me, in flesh and blood. She was dressed casual in jeans and a white tee with something printed on it. I did not know how to respond. I was still in a pleasant shock, and slowly put my arms around her as she gave me a warm hug. Then, I felt my heart started to try to function like a human.

We exchanged pleasantries and she apologized for her disappearing act. I did not ask any questions nor did she say anything else. I did not need answers anymore. I was too excited to meet her and did not make any attempt to hide it. She blushed as I told her how elated I was to see her. We spent sometime just walking through the arrays. She politely declined the request for a coffee. The disappointment by the request being turned down was flushed out by her bright smile. She promised to meet again very soon. I replied in affirmative and I meant it. She hugged me again and I kissed on her cheek as we parted. She smiled and walked away. I wanted more of her. I wanted her completely. After a distance she turned around and smiled. It hit the last nail in the coffin. I fell for her. 

Walk on the Beach

It was far away and looked like a small candle, guiding many for miles both on land and water. Located on the distant hill, it was the ray of hope. The hill bore the brunt as the waves crashed against it, while some of them lay low and gentle along the shore. Together they created an orchestra. The breeze responded to the artists’ as it swayed across continuously providing much relief to the tired souls.

The water was cold and it teased by wetting the bare feet as we walked along the shore. The distance was becoming delightfully mean, as our hands soon were clasped. The grip was pleasantly tight and was more than welcome. We talked various things all along. The words were also getting miserly as they preferred to stay indoors.

Tired of walking we gave our feet some respite. We just lay down on the shore watching the waves. The starry sky formed the perfect roof on our heads. We were near, but painfully far from each other. While many emotions waited to be conveyed, silence played the perfect medium. Heart was pounding so hard that I felt she might hear it. A smile crossed her face as I made the first move of moving closer to her. She was still smiling approvingly.

I turned sideways and put my hand around her waist. She was close, excruciatingly close. I could smell Bulgari on her. The fragrance was intoxicating. Her dusky skin was smooth and it was flawless. She closed her eyes shyly as I moved gradually from her cheeks to her lips. They opened partially welcoming the move. As the lips were locked gently, I could feel her hands wrapping me in a warm embrace. It seemed like eternity. After couple of minutes, we withdrew. I looked into her eyes and kissed her forehead. I moved from her and was lying down next to her. Soon, I could feel her head on my shoulder and her arm across my chest as she cuddled into me. We smiled and kissed again. The rest of the night was spent counting the stars.

My First Crush

When everything seemed to be normal, my heart seemed to work extra as the increased blood flow seemed to swell the veins. The decibel levels of my heart beat were faded in the noise around. I could not help but put my hand on my chest trying desperately to appease.  

She preferred to walk with her companions always.  She seemed to glide as she entered the packed room. There was hardly any kind of movement of the torso. Dimples formed sheepishly as she smiled. The cheek bones moved a bit to accommodate the curving lips. Her eyes gleamed in acquiesce of her friend’s opinion. Her frock seemed to accentuate her thin frame.

Her clear skin glowed even at that time of the day. Her dark curly hair bounced on her shoulders as she walked. They made her look like a character from a fairy tale. She noticed the eyes that followed her but didn’t seem to care. I was in awe as she crossed me. She turned her head a couple of degrees and seemed to notice my gaze from the corner of her eye as her friend whispered something in her ears. They chuckled and passed by me.

She was like an angel. My eyes followed her, then my head and I was at a right angle by the time they sat in their respective places. She noticed that I was still staring at her. Our eyes were locked for a couple of seconds and I looked away breaking the connection. I felt vulnerable. I turned and bent my head down. I tried to see if she was still looking. I was let down as she continued to listen to the lecture. I lifted my head slowly in her direction when small white thing hit my face hard, deviating my focus. I turned irately to see who the perpetrator was only to be asked to get out of the class. As I picked up my bag and walked out, I could see her smiling. I was walking out humming a tune when another bullet hit me harder emphasizing the urgency to get out. The punishment was worth it. I was out on the corridors jumping in joy recollecting her smile. After all it was my first crush.

Love Happens

I never believed in love or any kind of attachments till she happened to me. She came like a whirlwind and we fell in love in just three days. I could not imagine a guy like me falling for someone. Perspectives change and I too had changed. I began to believe that love can happen at anytime and it just needs one right moment. Years passed, hearts broken, things changed, circumstances changed and I never experienced it again.

As I was scrolling down the contacts, I found a number to which the last communication happened months ago. I just sent a greeting and waited. I wondered if I would even get a reply as I did not expect one. After couple of minutes my phone blinked. She had replied. We exchanged the pleasantries and it did not end there. I never expected that we could go on. We hardly had anything more than a couple of dialogues whenever we crossed each other at work. Now we have just hit the right spot and it fired. Perennial flow of messages over three days and we clicked instantly.

After a lot of scheduling, we finally met after couple of years in person. The discussions started off with a cup of coffee and went around various things, different people and in fact our lives. Our little chat spilled over to a dinner, dessert, and some more coffee. We talked till wee hours of the morning, when we finally decided to rest our vocal cords. We felt that we have known each other for years. She did not hesitate as put my hand around her. She slowly turned towards me, smiled and slept cuddling me. I was more than happy to have her in my arms.

As we woke up drowsily, she kissed me and got out of the bed to prepare some breakfast for us. She looked beautiful, the night robe accentuating her curves. I closed my eyes, smiling to myself. I was delighted that I found someone from no one. It was silent around when I opened my eyes. I called out to her, but there was no response. I checked the entire house, but she was untraceable. Her number was not reachable. When I felt I had something, I had lost it. A lot of thoughts cluttered my mind.

Why did she leave suddenly? Why is she not reachable? Will I ever find her again?

TIME holds all the answers.

Long Day . . .

I woke up by the incessant vibration from the pillow. I saw that it was almost the time I had to leave. I turned aside and found her fast asleep. I smiled as the memories from the last eventful night played in my mind.

She was like a Noah’s arc swathed in a smooth satin. How much time HE had invested in creating this beautiful mortal, I wondered. I moved closer and slowly pulled the satin that was covering her. Her back glowed in the light which just managed to sneak its way through the drapes. Her delicate skin shied a little as I gently glided my finger all along her curvy back. She twitched and smiled. She slowly turned towards me; pull the sheets together to cover herself awkwardly. Her half opened eyes and the naughty smile were intoxicating. The stimulant hit my neurons directly as they blanked out for couple of seconds. I did some quick math and switched the phone off.

That was was going to be a long day… 

I Miss . . .

After a long day at office, I came home only to start working again. The coziness of the bed, with the help of overloaded dinner played a prank on me. The mail that was supposed to be resting in the sent items was still flashing on the screen. As I was shifting gears to deep slumber, I felt a hand on me. I woke up to see a very familiar face smiling at me. I smiled back acknowledging that I was supposed to put the sleep to rest.

Many other faces emerged out of the darkness slowly. They all quickly piled up and wished me. I was eventually dragged out of my bed to follow the rituals. While my arse received quite a caressing as apart of the ritual, I was given a unique face pack which comprised of the all the spreads, Jams, Jelly, and some dairy products topped with an egg. As the session progressed, gifts fell into my hands loaded with lots of love. It was a memorable night and they indeed made it special.

My phone was busy buzzing with wishes. However, there was a surprise call as well from a number which I did not expect. It too contained wishes, but brought back all the reminiscences from the past in a flash. I felt good, but at the same time, it flooded my mind with the fond memories of her.

As the clock continued ticking into early morning, everybody dispersed. I was happy as they never failed to surprise me. At the same time, it was hard for me to hold back those droplets desperately trying to break free. After 3 years of togetherness, celebrating without her was very different. There was void around me all the time. I could feel the place next to me empty for the one who would feed me the first piece of her handmade cake; the one who would plan the day for weeks just to make it special; the one who would embrace me in a warm hug and lovingly kiss me; the one who would eagerly wait for me to unwrap the presents and loved to find the excitement on my face; the one who would wait till the end for all the guests to go and take me home with her.

I went back to my bed alone; I missed her.

I Wish . . .

It sneaked in through the shades.  As I felt the warmth of its touch, I woke up and slide the shades. Morning was beautiful as the early rays bounced of the mist that settled down over night. The tiny droplets of water on the edges bore the images of the surroundings. I arched back to pull my dropping boxers, when I saw her lying in the bed wrapped under the sheets. Her back was smooth and radiated in the early morning light. I put the shades back properly trying to protect her from the hands of belligerent rays trying to touch her bare skin.

I longed to get back to her and cuddle into her. The thought itself was so strong that I had to force myself into the kitchen. I took many precautions to make sure that the noise from the kitchen did not disturb her sleep. I quickly filled up the table with multiple options of breakfast and went back to her. As I slipped my hand around her smooth skin, I could feel her hand pulling me closer and holding me tight. I loved the expression on her face. I so wished that I could remain like that forever, leaving everything.

I had to do it. I slowly moved up so that I could get a clear view of her face. I swooped down to her ear and slowly whispered. She acknowledged it as she planted a kiss. I kissed her back on the forehead and moved her to smell the hot breakfast waiting to be devoured. She pulled up the sheets to cover herself as she rested her back on the bed.  She smilingly outstretched her arms for a warm hug.

As I leaned forward for it, I hit the seat ahead and woke up. It was a dream? I felt bad and happy at the same time. I was feeling lighter. I adjusted myself and closed my eyes hoping to continue the pleasant experience. Suddenly the whole plane shook as if it was caught in turbulence. I woke up to find my friend standing by my side holding my drink and giving me a weird stare. I looked at him in disbelief and closed my eyes wishing that it was a dream.

Parenthesis

He heard the familiar music as the bell rang for the second time in less than a minute. The door opened and she jumped and hugged him.  He could feel her as she was lost in his arms completely.  She guided him inside and made him comfortable. Though he was not new to the place, but he felt something different about that day. He cast away the laptop, the constant weight of which had created a mark on his shoulder.  He was totally unaware of what would unfold in sometime.

Sandwich, grilled and stuffed, chips, and iced tea were placed in front of him. He was surprised that she had prepared all these in such short span of time. As he devoured on them, he could see the anticipation in her eyes waiting to hear the feedback. He closed his eyes, relishing the taste. The indication was not enough for her as she waited to hear the appreciation. He realized how famished he was, as he finished everything in front of him within no time. He looked into her eyes and thanked her for the food. She smiled contentedly and fell into his arms as he switched on her favorite show.

It blinked to life as he pushed the power button. He was lying in the bed and browsed through the channels impatiently. He munched onto the last few chips lying next to him and sipped last few drops of coke from the near empty can. He browsed through the mobile and threw it in a corner. He understood that things have taken a different road, the road he had to travel alone. He did not have any expectations as things were out of the hands. As he answered the bell he saw hand holding pizza and a bottle of coke. He looked up disinterestedly and shoved the bills into the hand.  He walked back to his bed as the door closed behind him.

Pink Slip

It was hardly couple of minutes and he is already gasping for breath. He was shocked at the way he was panting. He could no longer perform at the desired levels. He looked at himself in the mirror. He was no more that lean boy who had clocked 10,000 meters under 60min. He looked older, unfit and out of shape. Last 8 months had taken a toll on him. He did not seem to feel the cold water splashing his face as the reminiscences from the past hit him hard.

He was always there, whenever situation required his presence. He was the one on whom she could count on at all times and he did that with utmost passion. He had shut the doors of his life and opened the gates for her world. He had cast aside everything just to be with her, which she acknowledged and reciprocated. Horizon looked green until one day, his services fell short of her expectations; at least it appeared to. She seemed to drift away. He was required for few things now and his performance levels were not adequate to quench the thirst of her expectations. 

 

He wondered if he was under performing or her expectations have scaled new peaks. While he continued to be available at the shortest notice, he was forced to face the thing he dreaded the most. His services were no longer required and he was no more at the helm. Was this entrenchment a planned one? He has no answer. He had been just handed a pink slip.